Tuesday, September 9, 2008

It's midnight, and I can't sleep...

so, i thought, why not create a blog? it's kinda the trendy thing to do, which is why i haven't yet, but on nights like this when i drank regular when i should have had decaf, and my wife is not in the mood to deal with caffeinated dave (i get a little loopy), this might be a useful companion.

so i guess this is supposed to be a log of thoughts, or ideas, or happenings... well, today i can't stop thinking about persecuted indians (dot, not feather)... and imagining what it would be like to be in their position...


1Keep on loving each other as brothers. 2Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it. 3Remember those in prison as if you were their fellow prisoners, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.
4Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. 5Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."[a] 6So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?"[b]
7Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith. 8Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

that's kinda where i'm at. praying for them, and trying to remember them as if i were suffering... but trying not to be afraid of my creaking house, while i remember them... unless the Lord watches over the house, dave is just a paranoid idiot who can't fall asleep...(psalm 127)

and that money verse... it's funny how you value money all the more when you don't have it. just trying to remember that i have family around the world with alot less than i have, and to be grateful (which is easy) and content (which isn't always). consumerism is flowing through my red white and blue veins. :)

but in my reflective late-night blogging mindset, i am content. i really am. and it's all because of Jesus. materially he's blessed me immensely, but the invisble blessings even outweight those (well, not in mass, or weight i guess... but you know what i mean...) lord help me remember.

i've been praying alot for the Holy Spirit to inspire my spirit, and remind me of truths that if i take even a brief second to consider, easily inspire me. inspire me to work, to think, to be "strong & courageous", and completely devoted. cognitively i am, the decision is made. but i love to feel it. to feel my spirit well up with God's Spirit... to feel faith expanding in my chest, hotwiring my heart to pump louder than the noise around me. faith that drowns social norms and makes me wreckless for Christ. at first, i felt guilty for asking God to remind me of things that i should remember on my own, or inspire me as if it were his job to entertain my phsyche, or emotions... but what i'm asking is deeper than that, and the more i thought about it, the more i realized that what i was asking for is the very thing the Spirit of God desires to do! it's the very thing Jesus left the earth to allow every believer who calls out to Him... it's power that comes from faith. it's faith that transcends reason. it's a willingness to sacrifice self for just the glimpse we've seen of Someone so great, that His glory is worth our demise. the realization that the Spirit inside of me deserves the best from his living temple... i just want my life's work to be as efficiently and effectively useful to Him as it possibly can. My utmost for his highest... I'm gonna go read some more... goodnight...

No comments: